Losing My Answers

16 more days till I cross the threshold into adulthood. It comes with mixed feelings.

No longer will I be able to justify my actions by saying, "I'm just a kid!". I would actually have to really think things through beforehand. It's a scary thought.

The euphoria of finally being treated like an adult is overshadowed by the fact that it will never happen. I love being such a kid. Pouting my lips and putting the blame on anyone but myself. Add that to my overly sensitive nature and you get the biggest 10 year old in the world. These childish traits of mine are here to stay.

Probably my most unchildish demeanor would have to be thinking waaay too much. It's times like these that I really wish I was a 10 year old instead. I hate repeating my mistakes. Whoever said you actually learn from your wrong doings knew jack shit. I think I did something yesterday that need not had happen. It went through my head like some sort of record on repeat.

"Don't do it..Don't do it..Don't do it"

But I bloody hell did it anyway! *Wails*

I have to stop doing this to myself. I have to learn to chill big time. Things are always easy till you add more shit onto the pile.

Come to think of it, I am happy too at the way it is. What else do I want?